THERE’S a local coffee shop in town that I sometimes hang out whenever moi is in Iloilo Viejo (for the uninitiated, the old “downtown”). As I usually have my coffee with a cake or some pastry, I would ask the barista what they would suggest and the reply is almost always “Sir, try the ‘BTS’ cake. It’s one of our best sellers.”
Naturally, my response would be “Ok, I’ll have the Americano and that BTS, but first tell me what the letters mean.” And that’s when the fun begins.
If the barista happens to be female, almost always she would blush first before fumbling at a loss for words, then answer in a low voice as if to make sure the other customers do not hear what she is about to say.
A male barista has no problem at all; he would just tell you with a straight face what “BTS” means. Some of the naughty ones would answer with a mischievous smile and a glance at his female co-barista who usually blushes upon mention of the meaning of “BTS”.
Dying of suspense? Just hold on a while and here it is…drum roll. “BTS” means “Better than Sex.”
Ok, so there’s a coffee shop in Iloilo City that sells a cake flaunted by their baristas as better than sex.
As Alice would quip in Lewis Carroll’s immortal novel, Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland & Through the Looking-Glass, “It’s getting curiouser and curiouser.”
For starters:
Research indicates that specific nutrients in some food we eat — from common vitamins to lesser-known plant extracts — have demonstrated positive effects on very specific aspects of sexual performance. Ok, so there’s a line or a connection so to speak between food and sex.
A coffee shop in Iloilo selling a cake that is billed as better than sex sounds too good to be true; why, this will make the world’s oldest profession obsolete.
On the plus side, it will make a lot of priests, spinsters and bored housewives happy and this will reduce if not stop the spread of sexually transmitted diseases. Middle-aged men who want to rekindle their candles (pun intended) need not frequent videoke bars anymore; all they need is just to eat “Better than Sex” cake.
If indeed this cake is better than sex there will be no more women that are “na ano” in the immortal words of that misogynist extraordinaire, Tito Escalera.
On a serious note:
Havas, a French multinational advertising and public relations company, recently surveyed 11,976 people between 18 and 55 years old from across the world and found that we really, really love our food. Sixty percent of respondents said eating can be as pleasurable as sex, and nearly half of women said given the choice between a great dinner and great sex, they’d choose the dinner.
An additional 31 percent of women chose the neutral option (indicating they wouldn’t necessarily choose either), which means that less than one in four women would definitely pick amazing sex over a gourmet dinner.
So there is definitely empirical data that in some instances people prefer food over sex and food is not only better than sex but pleasurable as well.
Wow! People can indeed achieve orgasm just by eating, and I mean food literally. It really takes the term “food porn” to a truly sensual level.
For the uninitiated:
Food porn is a glamorized spectacular visual presentation of cooking or eating in advertisements, infomercials, blogs, cooking shows or other visual media, food boasting a high fat and calorie content, exotic dishes that arouse a desire to eat, or the glorification of food as a substitute for sex.
On the downside, the fact that there are those that will substitute food for sex will result into a lot of obese, sexually-deprived people which is not good.
Great sex has always been good for us; it does not only propagate the human race as what the good Lord intended but it also burns calories and produces a sense of fulfillment and well-being.
On a personal note, I’d take sex anytime over food but that’s not saying I won’t eat after sex.
So let me go back to that coffee shop whose name we cannot mention. In one of their shops along Delgado Street moi asked a female barista, “So is it better than sex?”
And she replied, “Good but not better. I’ve had better sex, Sir.” And my lovely wife who was with me smiled and said, “Sweetheart, to your credit I agree with her.”
So there. (brotherlouie16@gmail.com/PN)
