BY EDISON MARTE SICAD
FREEDOM of expression may also include the venting of one’s anger and frustration against a person or an institution. There is a cathartic release, an emotional relief that eases the pain in one’s heart, which helps a person to maintain his sanity, lower his blood pressure, and learn from the situation.
The accessibility and anonymity that social media platforms give to the people sometimes lead to irresponsible remarks and even to libelous statements.
How is Freedom of Expression more related to Responsibility rather than to the Right of a person?
There is of course a professional manner of expressing one’s discontent. In a personal way, we may call it fraternal correction, parental guidance, or friendly advice. We may also include protests and rallies, criticisms and evaluations, honest opinion, vigilance, or frank disposition.
In an institutional setting, we have grievance machineries, open forums, and the rules of court, among others.
But here’s the challenge: as much as possible, do not complain, nor explain.
DO NOT COMPLAIN
* complain (verb): express dissatisfaction or annoyance about something. (Oxford Languages)
I am not saying that we will tolerate injustice. I am referring here to our needless whining and reactive tendencies in our day-to-day encounters. Complains can mostly happen in our minds as we get to meet difficulties in the office, work with a difficult person, or become irritated at home.
Try this: Why am I reacting this way? Is this the proper way of responding to this situation? Why is this person behaving in this manner?
Questions. Yes. Let us try to be conscious and aware of our own behavior. My intention here is to make us really in charge. For this is what freedom is all about. Of course, this is not easy. We are dealing with our good old stubborn habits.
If you think that complaining is your daily dose of sanity, fire away. Some people are just meant to be aggressive and outspoken.
But if you think that complaining doesn’t really lead to better health, more cooperation, improved results, or higher salary, you may step back for a while and give it a moment of thought. Ask the questions. And listen to your own honest response.
DO NOT EXPLAIN
* explain (verb): to make plain or clear; render understandable or intelligible. (dictionary.com)
In an academic setting, explanation is an effective means in conveying an idea. Group discussions and company decisions do require a lot of explanations in the process of arriving to a final action with accountability.
It is quite different if it becomes a demand that you have to justify your personal choices that are private and personal. In the same manner that you don’t expect others to fully understand and support your personal choices in life, no one has the right to demand from you an explanation.
You don’t have an obligation to explain your every move for someone else’s satisfaction.
Try this: Am I in-charge in this aspect of my life? Do I need help in this situation? Will others be affected by my decisions and choices in a very disadvantageous position?
Questions. Yes. Be open for dialogue — even for an inner dialogue. Reflection is a step towards maturity and responsibility. Sometimes, the best solution is arrived at not from a heated debate or intense discussion. Sometimes, silence and introspection, listening to our conscience, is the most appropriate means of knowing the right choice.
But if you think that the approval of others defines your worth as a person, then so be it. Some of us do need the opinion and support of others to survive and thrive in this world.
However, if the conversation becomes discriminating and incriminating, silence may do more good.
Our tendency of collecting approvals could also be our devious way of manipulating others to have a good opinion of us.
Eventually, experience will give us the lessons. Boldness and fragility, courage and uncertainties, selfishness and sacrifice, the inner conflicts, the tensions in life, will test our resolve and pave our path to wherever our decisions will lead us./PN
