I’M REALLY happy with all the things and talents I’m good at.
Surely, I wish I could worry less, and sabotage less my romantic relationships, but I’d rather push love to the limits than pretend to be dumb, or less passionate.
So to be honest, I don’t really wish I weren’t good at showing passion.
I’m so good at my love languages that my lovers are often overwhelmed.
Many times, this is a deal breaker for them.
But I haven’t really met someone who would inspire me to change my ways.
Maybe it’s my wish to exhaust, and burn people out.
But if they can’t take my love, why should I stay with them?
*
I grew up poor so, yes, there were many things that I really wanted that my parents refused to buy me as a kid.
I think our poverty, and my parents’ frugality (with me), helped my growth as a person so I ended up not wanting so many things in life.
In our family, I am probably the least materialistic.
I’m a cheap guy.
I do not go for brand and signature products (unlike my parents and siblings).
I buy cheap things, and often get what I deserve.
But on the whole, I am happy and content with whatever I have.
*
There is no one event that really defined me.
Every significant milestone in my life showed a different side of me.
You see, I’m many things: nurse, teacher, writer, filmmaker, actor, celebrity, bum.
But my 50th year really taught me the most about myself.
It’s easy to see why.
Six months before my 50th birthday, I have already tried to be conscious, and reflective, of the things that are happening (and have happened) in all my years.
I tried to think more about my contentment and happiness. I’ve reflected on my life, and choices, until I turned 50.
And honestly, I’m so proud of everything that I’ve become despite the detours, the bum years, the could-have-beens, the big regrets.
*
I’ve been partial to wine even before I met my late husband.
But I still think that wining and dining are the things he introduced to me that I now like very much.
Oh, and taking my coffee black!
I used to be a tea drinker until I was about 35.
Then, I discovered coffee to be a good laxative for me.
I started with instant coffee, sugar, and creamer.
Then, my late husband started making brewed coffee, and that’s when I discovered drinking coffee black with him.
I like the idea of taking my coffee as bitter as it comes.
If only to remind me that some things in life are meant to be bitter.
*
I didn’t really read much creative literature in school.
(I studied Biology at the university.)
But I remember laboring through One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez.
The Latin American magic realism style was life-changing for me.
But I immensely enjoyed Antoine Saint-Exupery’s allegorical The Little Prince.
When I could finally afford it, I’ve read the classics, and the modern masterpieces, but The Little Prince remains a favorite.
It has become almost a Bible for me.
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I’m not into fashion trends.
If at all, I often go against the fashion trend — be it in clothes, or hairstyle.
I pierced my left earlobe for earrings in 2008.
I don’t remember that it was a fashion trend, but I’m sure I didn’t do it for a trend.
I pierced my ears, two on the left lobe (and left lobe alone), for a pair of diamond earrings.
I mean, diamond earrings!
*
The cartoon TV selections were limited when I was growing up.
I watched a lot of Popeye, Justice League, and Smurfs.
I like Smurfs a lot, but my favorite cartoon TV was Ron-Ron The Flower Angel.
I’m still searching for it online, to no avail. (500tinaga@gmail.com/PN)
