THE SCOTTISH highlands is 146 miles from Newcastle.
Edinburgh is 92 miles from where I stayed in Newcastle.
I’ve been to Scotland before, mainly Edinburgh.
But we also went as far as Inverness on our way to Loch Ness, which is famous for the folklore monster.
I didn’t see Nessie, but for a sense of being there, I drank the water from Lock Ness.
So there!
***
Still, I wanted to see Scotland again.
I even wanted to buy some of their kilts and Scottish accessories.
More importantly, I wanted some Scotsmen.
But, again, UK, omicron, Covid testing, essential travels, you know the drill.
I decided to stay in Newcastle.
Out of boredom, I occasionally turn on my Grindr app.
***
Fresh meat phenomenon, I am constantly hit upon by the locals.
Especially that I am a Vers Top*.
(*Versatile top: a top dog position person, but can also bottom.)
On my eleventh day in Newcastle, I met Fergus on Grindr.
***
Grindr profile name: Fergus 22.
Distance: 2 miles away.
Keywords: beard, bear, geek, bi.
Profile description: I’m into all kinds of fun, I’m vers, so sometimes I like to top, but love bottoming too, get in touch if you’re up for some fun, I’d love to meet a guy who’s open for a relationship though, even better
Gender: Man
***
His profile picture is that of a young chubby guy, probably overweight, nice blond mass of hair and beard, but (zoomed in) the lips look so pink, and the eyes were gorgeous blue.
Twenty-two.
I really have to take a deep breath at that because I just turned 53!
But I’m bored.
And I’m “the” Peter Solis Nery, #ThePSN.
If someone takes chances, it’s usually me.
Would I really feel rejected if I’m rejected by a 22-year-old, albeit chubby guy?
***
Thus, this conversation in 36 minutes (his non-punctuation kept unedited for authenticity):
(9:02 am) +You are so cute… and cuddly?
— Oh thanks very much (plus smiling and blushing emoji)
— Yeah definitely
+ What are u up to today?
— Not much a pretty nice chilled Sunday maybe some cooking or trying to write music
+ Write music! Hey, would u like to meet? I’m a writer myself. And I want to be with a local just to get a sense of life here. I’m visiting from the US & leaving for Stockholm on Wednesday.
— Oh wow cool! Yeah sounds fun I should be free a little later on
— I passed through Stockholm a while ago
— Went on a Baltic cruise years ago very fun
+ That’s awesome. More to talk about later, if we meet. Can u accommodate or do u wanna meet somewhere public? Nothing fancy. I’m just staying with family-friends. Don’t drive and accom, sorry
— Unfortunately I don’t accom but I’m still happy to meet up somewhere
+ That’s great. I’ll be bussing my way
— Ok well I live in a little place called Cullercoats that’s near Whitley Bay
+ So I can just get a 309 Blyth bus from New York? Hehe
— Yeah I think so
+ I need to plan my rides, it’s also a Sunday schedule. Where do u want to meet? Estimate time?
— I should be free at 12 roughly and could meet at Cullercoats metro station.
+ Is the metro station the most convenient for u? Coz it looks like another train ride or 1 mile walk from the bus terminal/stop
+ Btw, my name is Peter. My cell number is +44-752-2**5-4X9
— Yeah I’m right next to it
— Ok great I’m Fergus and my number is +44-746-945X-17*
— I’ll give you a ring when my parents actually decide to get up so we can have a chat
+Ok. That’s great (9:38 am)
***
It’s a Sunday.
I’m bored, and feeling cooped up in my hosts’ house.
The day ticket for the bus is £4.
Worst case scenario, I’ll just have a joy ride with the bus.
But, come on, who among you wouldn’t take your chances?
And so, I changed into the pinkest pink I could get into, and took the bus to, first, Whitley Bay.
***
Adjustment: day pass all-zones is £6.
I think I should still be good with a £4 bus pass; but I’m thinking, in the worst case scenario, I want to go to Newcastle City Centre, and watch a play or something.
So I upgraded, and as we will see later, regretted the £2 extra for the rest of my life.
***
This is a two-part mini-series because you are having so much fun with my Grindr stories.
And so far, we are only talking about my Northern England hookups.
My sexlife is the stuff of legend.
And I am so happy to live and tell the tale.
— You are welcome! (To be continued)/PN
